Thursday, August 30, 2007

Today in Extraordinarily Odd

Tyson Gay the sprinter as opposed to say, a playground taunting name that Tyson Bickford may have suffered through being called, has won the title of fastest man on earth after he won the 100 meters and 200 meters, each in record time and within 36 hours of each other. One question really remains though; what is he actually running from? Could it be time, Mr. Gay, to turn and face your demons? You may be good at it but, for the sake of your happiness, stop running. [source]

I was beginning to think that the Germans and Austrians were going soft. There have been no stories about weird fecal sex, contemporary Nazism, nudist colonies or somehow managing to insist that bondage be a part of everyday life at all recently. Except now. A 19 year old man in Austria was arrested after he was found next to the mutilated body of his 49 year old room mate. He had blood all over his mouth and he had put some of the organs on a plate in the next room. Yes, I think that pretty much makes up for any lack of European weirdness in the last few weeks. [source]

Always with a finger on the pulse of what is going on and indeed, what people want, Japanese rice cracker manufacturers have FINALLY decided to infuse the spicy essence of wasp into their crackers. That way you can eat a smashed, poisonous insect at the same time as standing around at a party and who hasn’t wanted to do that forever. I mean, certainly not me. I finally feel able to do what I’ve always wanted to do and that is eat a freaking wasp with guacamole. [source]

Three men in Missouri hatched a genius plot to steal some beer and when I say genius I mean GENIUS. One man walked into the store naked and hula danced while the other two tip toed (probably) to the fridge and stole beer. They were caught later on when the police identified the car through the license plate. Those guys would have been so excited and validated by the fact that they got that beer and then BANG, three days later it all came crashing down. Where did they go wrong? It’s actually more or less impossible to tell. Still, this is what teenagers do for beer because they're not allowed to drink it until they've been voting for three years.[source]

That platinum and diamond encrusted skull that Damien Hirst made has just sold for 50 million pounds. It cost 14 million to make. That means, that simply because Damien Hirst’s aura has been projected upon that skull, it has more than tripled in value. Damien Hirst must be some kind of deity. Just like a rockstar/deity, he is planning on taking the skull on a tour around the world even though it’s been sold which means that everyone will get to marvel in the inanimate object that contains the aura of Damien Hirst. The great thing about it is that there’s no way anyone could steal it no matter how much it is worth. How would anyone get THAT past customs anywhere? You certainly couldn’t wrap it up and give it to someone. They’d know you stole it! From God.[source]

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