The Reluctant Whore

So the Daily Mail published this piece about what happened at the V Festival in the UK this weekend and the headlining story is about how Lily Allen ranted about President Bush while on stage in the UK. She called George W Bush a “fucking cunt”.

Is there any way Lily Allen could possibly run her antics by someone just to check and see what might work and what might be anihilatingly lame ahead of time? The little episode where she got some publicity for apparently being denied a visa was essentially effective but frankly, I still don’t quite understand what exactly happened there. Yelling about George Bush is such a predictable thing to do. Hasn’t everyone done it at some point? By ourselves while we walk down the street or, you know, at the dinner table with the fam? When the Dixie Chicks did it years ago it was brave and new and they actually had done their homework.
Seven years into the administration, you have to have a specific reason for saying it. You can’t just walk out on stage and churn out the words “George W Bush”. There are new reasons to hate him every day, just take your pick. Lilly Allen was totally lame. A drunken giggle does not a political argument make.

And the thing is, if say, Madonna did it and then never really explained herself, it could potentially get through because with Madonna, you know she’s a totally high impact, extraordinarily intense, complex woman who really could be capable of levitation let alone political argument. With Lilly Allen it’s impossible to believe that she reads the newspaper. How could she be substantially of international current events when she spends all her time figuring out how to emulate the publicity stunts of celebrities that have gone before her? Like, you know, making sure everyone knew she was possibly to be arrested straight after Paris Hilton. Although, to be fair being carried down the street in a linen bag after going out to a club all night was pretty hilarious. Because when you’re being carried down the street in a large linen bag by four of your people, it means you’re invisible.

So, yeah, that’s that. The thing is, there were a number of pictures attached to this article and one was of Sophie Ellis Bextor, who sang “Murder on the Dancefloor” a few years ago and wore that hideous green eye shadow. She also had one of those faces like Danni Minogue where it looked like she was born to lie around on the pages of an edgy fashion magazine run by some young graphic designer upstarts who feature fashion editorial after fashion editorial of Immitation of Christ couture clad emaciated men and women lying in alley ways with hyperdermic needles falling out of their arms.
Who knows which face came first, Danni Minogue or Sophie Ellis BExtor but both of them seemed to have had enough matter hacked out of their cheeks by surgeons that their jawlines looked as though they could cut glass.
That’s why it’s totally unusual to see Ms. Ellis Bextor actually smiling. She always used to look so serious and pompous. In this photo she’s smiling and it just seems like her face is in inordinate pain not to mention how hilariously torturous it must be for her to wear such a ludicrous frock. Tremendous tremendous, soul twisting pain. It’s not natural for her. Not in the slightest. This is a growing time for Ms. Bextor. She is learning new things like backing vocals and irony. [source]