The Reluctant Whore

Eddie Murphy, Lohan and Britney Spears aren’t the only ones who get shafted with lawsuits by people who decide to chime in with a ludicrously inflated financial grab after a scuffle.

Professional, gnarled bigot Don Imus is now being sued for slander and defamation by Kia Vaughn, star center for the Rutgers Women's Basketball team. The lawyer for Vaughn has been quoted as saying:

"Don Imus referred to my client as an unchaste woman. That was and is a lie."

“This is a lawsuit in order to restore the good name and reputation of my client, Kia Vaughn”

The reputation and good name she once had at university. Once. That was until Imus called her and her team mates “Nappy Headed Hos” on his radio show. Then her entire life became something else, presumably.

I’m sorry, but how was her reputation honestly fundamentally tainted by the inane, out dated, racist ramblings of an archaic radio announcer? He was rightfully dragged through the coals and fired, she was practically a saint for the week and a half it was being shouted about on the network news programs. Was there anyone who honestly took Imus’ side in this? It was the entire world against Imus and, at the end of the day, what he actually said became a soundbyte fragment of a much larger argument that went beyond the Rutger’s Basketball team.

This suit bares remarkable similarity to the outrageously bratty lawsuit thrown at Eddie Murphy by Melanie Brown. Perhaps, for a moment, we could examine this for what it really is.
Not surprisingly, Imus, as is being reported by ABC, is being courted by plenty of networks and, it is speculated that he’ll be back on the air in January.

Gee, so that really only leaves the Rutgers Women’s Basketball team with nothing in their hands but a contractually obligated apology from Don Imus and, let’s also not forget, the support of the entire nation. They may very well deserve compensation on some level but it’s just so astonishing the way that people who sue really are culturally required to make it look like they’re all about humanitarian concern. It’s could never be about the 9 million dollar house and 18 years expenses being requested, that's not important. It's about the principle.

The boys who were forced to be the passengers to Lohans insane car chase on the night she was arrested threw in the statement that they were concerned for Lohan and wanted her to get the help she needs. It’s a sure bet that they’ll be right there talking her through that help program, through an assistant, over the phone from their hotel room in the Bahamas.

K-Fed hired an ex-Israeli commando to make it look like he was getting militaristic in the quest to keep his little sons safe while his actual plea for custody is almost certainly anchored in how much money he’ll get from Britney every month. Just incidentally, why is he being so grabby?

Am I the only one who knows it’s a fundamental certainty that once he finally releases that long awaited album he’s been graciously preparing for the world (I, personally, am finding it harder to get out of bed each morning knowing that I’ll be going another day without it) he’ll be nothing short of a cultural triumph and will be beloved by the world…oh, sorry I just threw up my lung.

It’s astonishing the extent to which the moral hysteria clouds the central issue with Imus. It’s entirely business and everything is a calculated decision. Even the suit from the Rutgers Basketball team member. [source]