Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Today in Extraordinarily Odd

Even though it appeared rational thought had prevailed a few months ago when the local judge that sued his local dry cleaners for 54 million dollars lost his case, rest assured that the case has been appealed and that in fact, the saga may now continue. It’s important that this case continue too because the legal precedent being set here is tremendously important. This man lost pants. He therefore is entitled to the income of the family who own the dry cleaner business he uses. The income for the rest of time. If Ricky Martin doesn’t run for King of the Universe, this man and his glittering pant suit must. [source]
Whenever there’s a headline that says “World’s Oldest” or “World’s biggest” or something, you know to take it with a grain of salt because who knows if there isn’t some slightly more modest person out there who is older or bigger or fatter or stupider? We’re not all media-savvy. So, reports are rumbling around the world that the oldest person in the world is Yone Minagawa. Or was rather. She died today at 114. The source for this post talks about all the other old people so, you know, let’s just nod and agree but not carve it in stone. Suffice to say, a pretty old Japanese woman died. She was too old in fact. Too old. [source]
A Japanese man who was riding his bike hit a safety barrier noticed nothing TOO difficult about it so he continued riding for 2 km. It was only at the 2km mark that he noticed he’s lost the bottom portion of his leg. As in, his leg had literally been cut off but he didn’t notice it was gone. If that isn’t a testament to the power of focusing on the goal then really, nothing is. What really wrecks this story though is that because he lost his leg but didn’t notice it gone, it was up to his friend to pick up the dismembered limb and catch up. THAT, dear reader, is the height of rudeness. How utterly selfish. Here’s an adult who wasn’t taught to pick uphis toys after playing with them. The leg was apparently squished beyond repair and perhaps that will teach him a lesson. [source]
A woman has gone to jail for 30 days for claiming to be the wife of her son to police authorities. If this were in the South you’d immediately of course make the observation that she probably WAS his wife in all other ways but legally (and possibly sister and mother and maybe even father) but this was in Indiana. Who the hell knows what was going on there? Probably no one. What a lazy assed piece of crap son. [source]

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