Friday, August 24, 2007

It’s actually really difficult to argue that Dina Lohan is a fast learner. She’s one of those people who just sort of keep doing the same thing but she works hard at it. Like, she’s never quite learned that sinking her fangs into her daughter won’t take away the fact that her showbiz aspirations are pointless because she’s way over the hill, is vile and has no talent but regardless of her chronic inability to evolve she still hammers away at the belief that someday it will happen by proxy. Actually, who the hell knows how she actually arranges it in her head.

She is reliable though, she can have that and that’s why it’s no surprise that she’s been talking to some high profile entertainment reporters about how Lindsay Lohan is going to jail for 24 hours after repeatedly getting messed up on a whole alphabet of leisure drugs and driving like a freaking lunatic etc etc. Dina was quoted at E! online saying:
“It’s really sad,” Lindsay's mom said when I asked how her daughter was doing after being sentenced to jail time. “Something bad is going to happen, I’m afraid.”
It’s really sad? If it had been anyone else Lohan would have been locked up for years. For some reason she drew the celebrity luck card and went in the opposite direction of Paris Hilton. The thing is, people don’t really hate Lohan because she has talent so maybe the judge somehow reflected that difference. The judge on the Hilton case was cheered at Church for not backing down on his decision so you know there was some smug Christian judgment going on with the Hilton sentencing that had nothing to do with Hilton’s actual behaviour.
The great part of the Dina Lohan quote has got to be “Something bad is going to happen, I’m afraid.”
Something bad is going to happen …now? And now it’s worthy of conscious recognition? It seems like “something bad is going to happen, I’m afraid” is a phrase she could have used several hundred times over the past 21 years with Lindsay Lohan and yet only now, when the situation is about a brilliant as it could be, does she actually click. What a charmer.
When I asked Dina how the family is holding up, she said: “Busy, busy.”
Which of course means she’s focusing on the other kids. Ally and Dakota are currently chained to a brick wall inside the Lohan Merrick, NY home and Mama Lohan is sitting in a chair nearby shouting choreography instructions at them. All the while she keeps her eyes on the ground because if she looks at them she’ll just see how young and naïve they are and how much work she has to do to get them to the point where they’re worth something.
Look, at the end of the day, it’s just good that Dina Lohan is still in the public eye and that she’s able to talk. I'm interested to know about any new projects she has and I'd certainly pay to see her act and sing. She could sing a little. Dance a little. Tell a story. Anything would be fine. [source]

No comments: