Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Today in Extraordinarily Odd

Mexico City has started a women-only bus service to protect female passengers from groping and verbal abuse and that’s great because ultimately, we know there’s nothing that can be done about men groping women. They must do it or they will die. It’s unfortunate in that respect. But at least now, if women do end up getting groped, the men can exclaim that they had the option to get the grope free bus and so clearly they were asking to be groped. Excellent work Mexico City. Now, can I get a bus where there aren’t any fat stupid drunks who take up two whole seats, salivate and smell so bad I actually cough? Where’s my bus line? [source]

A new study from Japan finds that outgoing people are most at risk for being overweight, according to a report from Reuters. Japanese researchers found a link between weight, body mass index and personality, according to a study published in the Journal of Psychosomatic Research this month and yet, I’m not sure where the surprise with this is coming from. This is why French women are thin. They’re always so concerned and furious that their husbands are womanizing and yet they internalize it and so that’s why they’re so painfully thin. It’s entirely about internalized rage and stress. It’s rather paradoxical that if you forcibly keep something inside you, you’ll lose weight. Not foods though; if you shovel that in and then never actually excrete it you’ll die. There’s something that maybe wasn’t clear about this study. I’m glad I cleared that up. [source]

Jessica Wittenbrink was crowned "Miss South Florida Fair" on the weekend and, right on cue, she made the claim that her dress had been vandalized by someone backstage. She claimed that someone had put lipstick on her dress. When the police came to check it out, because they actually did. The Police came to check out a potentially vandalized dress – they found that there wasn’t enough to convict anyone or prove it had been done intentionally. I love that the police came. You know that some frantic stylist queen made the call, almost in tears and shaking while talking on his cell phone and when the local police chief found out it was a beauty queen emergency he threw his donut aside, knocked over his coffee, hoisted his momentus gut off the desk and rolled out to the squad car, sweating all the way. He probably took the entire staff of cops with him and used the siren. These beauty queen bitches are out of control but it’s just because they know beauty pageants are pointless and that they have to up the ante if they want to get any real publicity out of a win. [source]

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