Friday, January 11, 2008

Here’s something we didn’t immediately find out about the freak out attack that happened last week at Britney’s house that involved the police, fire department, ambulances, a stretcher and a rapidly melting down Mademoiselle Spears: US Magazine reports that when little Jayden James was taken into custody it was found he had bruises and bite marks on him.

Oh my GOODNESS – just when think it can’t get any freaking worse, the kid was bitten! And probably viciously beaten! Probably by a protein desperate Spears. After all, all she seems to eat are high impact corn syrup laden frapuccinos and I’m guessing chunks of American cheese that she keeps in her glove compartment. How weird that that part of the car is actually called a “glove compartment”.

So, the great thing about this is that while we’re taken for a ride through the potential nightmarish scenarios that may have led to Jayden James being bitten, ie. that Britney morphed into a neurotic squirrel and mistook him for an acorn, at the end of the story – the security guard suggests that it was all just a little fighting between the boys. Sean Preston apparently bit Jayden James. Oh, ok. Ok well, that’s sort of normal. The little boys were squabbling and that’s what happened.

But the ride was fun, right? I mean it was like what happens when you eat a pound of gummi bears and you get the sugar rush and then crash and want to kill yourself (I'm not the only person who gets that, right?). At least I got a break from thinking about data entry when I read this kind of thing. [source]

No comments: