Thursday, September 20, 2007

Today in Extraordinarily Odd

Two Australian lesbians who wanted one kid used IVF and got twins and now they’re suing their doctor. The weird part about this is that the lesbians would turn DOWN a child seeing as they are, as a collective, usually baby HUNGRY. I mean, at least this way, both parents could have one and be completely occupied. The great part about this, of course, is that now that the kids are three years old and this lawsuit is getting media attention, there’s no way they can avoid explaining to the kids that they’re working as hard as they can to be compensated for the fact that one of the kids actually exists. That’s right, sooner or later one of those little twins will walk up to their lesbian mothers and say, “Which one of us didn’t you want, mothers?” And it will probably be the weaker one that has one leg shorter than the other and always has a cold. THEN what will they say? Hmmm? Yes, hadn’t thought that far ahead had you lesbian mothers of twins? [source]

A well balanced and healthy family that has kept and passed down through the generations the mummified corpse of a dead baby has astonishingly had the heirloom taken away from them by a judge who insists the body be buried. Why must the government meddle like that? It’s so unfair on the younger family members who were able, unlike their pitiful classmates, to involve an actual child while playing house. Plus, it gave them a real sense of cause and effect where they could see what they would end up like if they didn’t do as they were told. Everything is wrong with this and yet, nothing, at the same time, is wrong with it. It’s the perfect scenario in that respect alone. [source]

The Irish Defense Force has released fairly lackluster files indicating that they have had vague and mysterious interaction with UFOs over the past 50 years. People always say this about UFOs and I’m fairly certain this new revelation is no exception: UFO sightings only ever seem to happen in places where there’s an extremely low density of IQ. Why has there never been a UFO sighting in Manhattan? They’re always somewhere else like the middle of the badlands of nowhere where in fact, if people DID happen to see UFOs, they would most certainly have something else to live for besides TV and grits or potato based dishes that lack flavor and bite. Someone is quotes as saying they thought the UFO was "the same shape as a fried egg" which really proves he just needed culinary diversity. [source]

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