Thursday, September 06, 2007

The New York Post reports that Michelle Williams has been seen out wearing really steep stilettos and that can only mean one thing. Seeing as Heath Ledger and Michelle Williams have just broken up, the stage is now set for Williams to – if so chooses she – to become the next Britney. She certainly doesn’t have the same maddeningly controlled background in saccharine pop culture that Britney does but she does have a few things going on that could mean she’s a prime candidate for a top quality public freak down. Notice how the Post refers to that by simply mentioning shoes and the fact that she has a 23 month old kid? It's like you can hear the Post salivating through the page...

Firstly, what the hell is she doing right now anyway? Has she actually worked in a while? So, there’s that. Ledger is weird looking but he’s got this deep, male voice and hot school captain like demeanour that makes him marketable and he’s also been working so he’s right on track really. Williams – not so much. She has a strangely lame lesbian haircut and isn’t terribly commanding in general.

Could she be stepping out on the town, slutting it up in short t shirt dresses with no underwear on any time soon?

If that were to happen then a Britney Spearsian “My structured life just fell apart and now I’m a terminal mess” chaos and attention seeking sluttiness set against a backdrop of the “I used to live in Manhattan until I got married but I’m still clinging to the idea that I’m hip even though I’ve got a kid because I live in an apparently chic neighborhood and I go out to eat in rustic Italian restaurants that cost too much and I walk my kid in the park using an 800 dollar stroller and force people to accommodate for me at gallery openings and I’m ultimately god damned insufferable” Park Slope – could be entirely fascinating. After all, the nations crap, dumb celebrity messes all seem located in LA.

Kirsten Dunst is the only one so far who has sort of managed to combine a monied bohemian aesthetic with an alcoholic messy approach to getting dressed and going out. Well, Maggie Gyllenhaal breast fed in public recently but that doesn’t really count. So if Michelle Williams could champion that cause immediately by going out all slutted up in Park Slope or even the Lower East Side she might get more work and it could be great for business in Brooklyn too. So, it’s really win win for everyone.

Start throwing up in the street, Williams. Let out your crippling freakiness. It’ll do you good. [source]

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