Friday, September 07, 2007

So, it’s goodbye career, hello drug and or alcohol problem and b-grade irony laced film and TV roles from now for Vanessa Hudgens now that it’s been confirmed that she really is the woman in the nude pics that were labeled as her making the rounds online yesterday. The High School Musical 2 star was off to a great start in mainstream culture by remaining cute, translatable, and clean. Plus, she’d scored a probably somewhat orchestrated boyfriend in Zac Efron making her one of the most envied kids anywhere. After all, what straight teenaged girl or gay boy in their right mind wouldn’t want that – except for the chubby chasers obviously – Zac Efron is the new David Partridge. There are some middle aged women out there that still haven’t got over him.

But since the National Enquirer published racy nude photos of her online and her people today confirmed that she is the ho bag in them, her teen marketability has been shot down. The only metaphor that comes to mind about it immediately is that scene in Ghost busters where the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man gets shot down and his relentless sickly sweet smile turns to a look of horror as his fluffy guts are burnt open and spilled everywhere. Vanessa Hudgens is probably pretty aware of how that Stay Puft Marshmallow Man felt at the moment of impact right about now.

The other images that come to mind about this are anchored in how weird it must be for her to turn up to work now with all the synthetic bitches she works with staring smugly at her safe in the knowledge that their nude photos are under lock and key and therefore their marketability stays intact and also the image that dominates my mind is Hudgens in in the future, like say three years from now, in an alley rocking back and forth trying to smile as she repeats the words to "You Are the Music In Me" while petting a squealing stray alley cat and blankly staring straight ahead [source]

The image was actually up on Dlisted.com but it's not there anymore due to "copyright infringement". Certainly not horror infringement.

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