The Reluctant Whore

With the New York Post reduced to using timely reports about Paris Hilton’s apparent brother to justify publishing copy about her, the that, as TMZ claims, Paris just got out of jail a mere 20 days early should induce a sigh of relief in at least the media.

The American people are another matter though. Half of the TV watching public the kind of stupid people who think that it’s unfair that Paris Hilton had to go to jail because of how much she does for America and they look up to her. The other half have felt vindicated because she actually finally had to pay attention to details and be accountable for her actions. Oddly enough though, part of the reason she is famous is because people like to live vicariously through her and the fact that she can afford NOT to pay attention. Regardless, all of a sudden people were happy about her being brought down a peg or two.

So, now that she’s had her sentence reduced twice for no apparent reason, is it too much to suggest that there could nay MUST be rioting in the streets? No. It most certainly is not.
Still, audiences can take comfort in the fact that sure, maybe Paris Hilton is out of jail, sure she will probably go back to her old partying ways with little to no regard for anyone or anything and yes, Paris Hilton is above the law because she has money and that proves that rich people are better than poor people. It’s not complex.

But…she’ll never get to write that diary that might have earned her a million bucks and lots of mindless attention (her diet of choice). Also, as jail was to be a cocoon within which she would become an all-powerful celebubeast, she will have to remain a regular celebutard and forego the powers of ultimate all-powerful celebrity. Those powers were within her grasp but she gave them up to get out early. Oh well. Back to more of the same. [source]