Thursday, April 05, 2007

Celebrity Madness

So, it’s goodbye Gina Glockson, hello again Sanjaya Malakar…’s hair and continued seduction of the American Public. While celebrities and websites like Perez Hilton and Howard Stern championing the movement to "Vote for Sanjaya!" are probably somewhat responsible for Sanjaya's continued success so far on American Idol, there's got to be more about him that keeps him there besides ironic celebrity endorsement and his bad voice and how laughable it is that he's got this far. Real talent on American Idol isn't unreasonable to expect. Idol audiences have reliably rewarded some powerful vocalists like Kelly Clarkson and (not going to vomit, not going to vomit…I WILL NOT VOMIT) Clay Aiken. This time round, America is buying something different to actual vocal talent: the schtick of a performer whose appeal is similar to that of Paris Hilton - talentless but refreshingly uncomplicated. Sanjaya's appeal is more than likely the result of a combination of his prettiness, the naïve, good natured belief in himself and the total lack of angst he appears to have. Those qualities are especially valuable right now in a cultural sphere that deems the Anna Nicole Smith saga a daily, wait - HOURLY necessity. People are avoiding themselves and the drudgery of life the includes daily news about war and a pending presidential election in a big way right now they like a happy go lucky lithe Indian boy who can hula dance. [source] [source]

All the drugs inside Anna Nicole at the time of her death – the drugs that actually inspired her body to give up functioning, were prescribed by one doctor. Was there anyone in Anna Nicole’s life that didn’t subconsciously want her dead? Or, maybe she was so diseased and riddled with death and horror that actually the doctor was doing all that is humanly possible but the doctor was really no match for the death of Anna Nicole’s soul, which probably happened a long while before she died. Still, investigations are underway into the prescribing of those drugs and TMZ has thoughtfully put up a poll so the uninitiated public can sound off on whether they think the doctor should be disbarred. Because when in doubt, ask the audience that will bay for blood no matter what. [source]

Kevin Federline’s horrifyingly white trash, vampiric looking brother, Cameron, (we will refer to him as Rat Head) and when I say white trash I mean even more white trash and rat like than his over styled gigolo brother, is picked up and jailed (after all was said and done actually only for 5 days) for drinking and providing kids with alcohol. Apparently Rat Head had a little hog roast at his parents’ house and shared the moonshine around among the yungins. Even though no one really needed any more confirmation that K Fed was in fact, from tragic, yokel stock, this serves as a stern reminder. Federline people! Stop doing anything! [source]

No comments: