The Reluctant Whore

Celebrity Madness

After claiming the other day that he crushed up cocaine and mixed it with his father’s ashes and then snorted the mixture causing a collective gasp the media sphere over, Keith Richards backpedals and states that he didn’t actually do it at all. He apparently just mean it as a genius one liner – which it was. It was a genius concept and to tell the press he did it was genius. Sadly, it’s just not convincing that Keith Richards didn’t inhale the ashes of his burnt father because it’s not outrageous enough to be a complete lie. What is far more likely is that he is more or less mentally fried, the state of his epidermis and face certainly hints gently at that, he spoke unchecked in an interview and then, when shock ensued, his publicists suggested he retract. Why bother? What are they worried about, alienating a fan base through mention of drug use or distasteful mention of the dead? Oh please… [source]




Virgie Arthur wants the judge to let her be Dannilyn’s guardian ad litem thus renewing her relevance in the Anna Nicole paternity soap opera and keeping her hand in. Silly Virgie, no one with the figure of the Slug Queen from Monkey Magic could ever be totally irrelevant in a case like this – by which I mean – a case bought by Entertainment Tonight, the show whose staple material always includes a hideously obese woman or child America can marvel at and comparatively feel better about themselves. Additionally, Virgie Arthur going up for a court ruling of her own gives us something to tide us over while the judge drags out the paternity announcement for another week. Could Entertainment Tonight have had something to do with the judge opting to delay the announcement of one of their major angles in this story for another week? Perhaps an advertiser was promise premium ad placement for a certain number of weeks prior to the announcement…oh, certainly not. That’d be mind numbingly callous. [source]



Jumping on the Rosie O’Donnell bandwagon of shock and awe based self promotion, Christopher Hitchens stabs a toothpick into one of the two major open sores on the collective conscious of the US and the world in general; mainstream religion. While Rosie has been beating a new path of systematic attention seeking by going after high rating opponents who she knows will play ball with her, most recently reaching a new level of neediness by kicking the American abscess that is 9/11, Christopher Hitchens has taken her lead but far surpassed her in promoting his new book God Is Not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything. In it and in promoting it he systematically outlines the pointlessness of basically all the world’s major religions thus ensuring sky high levels of international disapproval and therefore book sales. [source]