Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Sharon Osbourne and Ozzie Osbourne are on the war path against Heather Mills because the Brit Awards are this weekend and they’re hosting the event. Gee, what a surprise, Sharon Osbourne is latching onto something for the sake of publicity. Sharon has been quoted as saying of Mills:

"I would boot her off [stage]. I think she's a miserable old cow." said Mrs Osbourne.

Ozzie apparently concurs:

"The body of work he's got is just unbelievable. But I really don't want to be there if Heather shows up. Never mind McCartney having a go - I think the audience will string her up. Sharon and I have met them both on a few occasions but if Paul doesn't know her, I'm fucked if I do. She's fucking nuts."

God, there are so many things wrong with everything about this story. Firstly, I don’t believe that Ozzie is really on board with this whole anti-Mills campaign primarily because it’s a safe bet that Ozzie, while insanely talented, hasn’t really been completely on board something without the ambitious prodding of his professional groupie wife since maybe forever. Or at least prior to that full year where he took LSD every day.

Secondly, Sharon Osbourne is good at this kind of thing and really, this kind of thing only. She gets assertive and aggressive about getting press by mouthing off about crap or by doing basic attention seeking things when she needs to secure her position of arguable cultural relevance. Last time she was at an awards show she threw a 30,000 dollar ring into the audience – effectively buying their approval and this time she’s hacking into the UK’s national tabloid target, Heather Mills. Everyone hates Heather Mills for messing with a Beatle in much the same way anyone in the US would attack someone who says they “hate the troops”. She’s an easy target.

Still, when you’re Sharon Osbourne and you’ve got no discernible talent besides cultural vampirism, you know which side of the bread your butter is on. She’s got the rock icon husband but he slips in and out of consciousness so everything falls to her to keep the family in furs and chicken skin dinners. Consequently, she takes a leaf out of the old Ann Coulter book. Ann Coulter didn’t write that book but I just think it’s the clearest analogy. What ever happened to Osbourne’s award winning show? What a remarkable show it was. So unique and mind numbingly pointless. [source]

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