Thursday, February 28, 2008

In Touch Weekly has just voted Matthew McConaughey as having the hottest chest in Hollywood (I’m assuming the hottest MALE chest in Hollywood – it would be a shame to not include all those starlets who put so much time, money and other matter into their chests to make themselves more attractive).

This is really the best kind of endorsement McConaughey can ask for seeing as essentially ALL his appeal is anchored in his physique. There is virtually no other reason to watch his work which includes…um…yes, exactly. In fact, it’s actually difficult to find a non-topless shot of him.
He was quoted as saying:

“I have no clue how many times I’ve been photographed without my shirt on,” Matthew says. “My motto is, ‘If they catch it, they catch it.’”

And what makes that quote interesting is that it’s entirely comprised of transparent lies.

A) He knows exactly how many times he’s been photographed without a shirt on. It's unclear to me, in fact, if he knows really anything else.
B) His motto is “If they catch it, they catch it” except I don’t think I’ve seen in recent memory a more blatant performance of fake zen calm. McCanaughey’s only link to cultural relevance is his chest – if they catch it he works, if they don’t: he’s doing bit parts in b-movies. There’s a lot more to his scheduled appearances shirtless than just random coincidence.
Thank goodness no one pays him to think. Ever. [source]

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