Wednesday, February 13, 2008

I mean, where do you start with Barron Hilton being arrested REALLY? Are we REALLY surprised?
The 18 year old brother of Paris Hilton was arrested for DUI and was reported to have a blood alcohol level of 0.14 which is almost double the legal limit.

Part of me thinks that this is really just how Kathy Hilton orchestrates the launch of her vicarious career in showbiz; through her children. She just tells the kids, “Look, just do what I tell you. You’ll go through a little pain at first but after that it’ll be all free dinners and media attention for ages…and that’s exactly what we want, isn’t it? ISN’T IT?” and she says this with her hand up in the air ready to backhand whichever kid she’s talking to with all her gawdy rings on just to make it extra threatening in case they don’t go with it. That’s her basic parenting technique; threaten with a bejeweled beating. Hilton kids know how much the jewels hurt too. It worked with Paris and the sex tape and now look at what a sparkling success she has become. Paris is older now so Kathy needs a new vehicle. Which is not to say that she literally force fed him liquor and then pushed him into a car - but the precedent of parental indifference was there enough to lay the groundwork.

Plus, the other thing is, this is the moment I’ve actually been waiting for to be perfectly honest. I mean, Paris Hilton has been rammed down everyone’s throats as the generic, all encompassing American zeitgeist sex object for like 6 years now and the entire time the only real interest I’ve had in her was anthropological; she’s emblematic of everything that poisons America into a state of complete disillusionment.

I always suspected that the Hiltons had probably fucked up Barron Hilton to the point where he’d do something dumb ass like this as though he were a character in a Brett Easton Ellis novel. That means, it’s only really a matter of time before nude photos of Barron are released and all I can say is it’s about god damned time. [source]

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