Monday, July 02, 2007

Today in Extraordinarily Odd

This was from late last week but it’s so intriguing that it doesn’t matter. A zebra and a horse mated and this was the result. From the looks of things, the DNA weren’t blended sufficiently. Oh, that’s not fair. The animal is probably really talented and sweet. Sure, it’ll go through some tough times at school and will suffer an almost soul destroying identity crisis but the lesson we learn here is, genetic abominations are just like anyone else and will therefore become either a famous billionaire success or will die at 15 of a heroin overdose. Or some other crap. [source]

The Chinese government has just issued new uniforms to its army after twenty years of forcing them to subsist in a baggy Communist chic get up. The men’s uniforms make them look taller and broader and the women’s make them look like they have a small waist which of course emphasizes their breasts and thighs. It’s important that military personnel exemplify the visual ideals of soft core sex objects and therefore its nice to see, after a panic driven bout of crippling regulations involving how cab drivers and police may wear their hair and installing spittoons in cabs at great expense for the Olympics, that the Chinese government is once again in touch with both reality and the well being of its people. [source]

According to results of a study released by biologists, piranhas are frightened little fish who have to hang out in gangs to get up the pluck to become the angry little flesh ravaging fish we have come to know and, for the sake of argument, fear. They don’t necessarily ENJOY being socially antagonistic brats, they just have to be to survive. Well well well. Look at that. It seems that the piranha, natures very own delinquent teen bully, displays more likeness to its human equivalent than we previously considered. All it ever needed was a mother’s love. [source]

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