Monday, July 23, 2007

Last week Nick Nolte’s haggard yet technically alive body was found essentially sleeping on the ground in Kauai airport. “Oh look,” all Nolte’s fellow travelers said while casually waiting for their own flights. “Why, it’s a Hollywood star lying on the ground, isn’t he meant to be coherent and rich? Why would he be lying on the ground?” Everyone had a good laugh. Even Nolte did, according to reports on TMZ last week.
Of course he did, he was probably medicated.
While no real explanation was given for his behavior in Hawaii, he was photographed again wandering around Malibu looking like a strange mix of John Hammond from Jurassic Park and a home challenged gentleman. This time, though, TMZ reports that his behavior is actually simply part of some research. That actually translates fairly clearly to the old “I was just rehearsing a play” defense which, while not entirely the most convincing explanation has a certain classical charm to it. They should have had him say it himself and ended the sentence with “Govner!” followed by a little street tap. There's nothing street tap can't wash over.
The fact that Nolte has effectively got across the idea that he’s researching or rehearsing has actually worked for him though. Well, it’s either that or no one cares enough to ask any more questions. [source]

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