Thursday, March 22, 2007

Celebrity Madness

The State of Tennessee drops the idea of honoring Justin Timberlake for his contribution to music. Voter survey results must be in in Tennessee and, it seems, the majority of the Tennessee voting public do not actually feel that Sexy being Brought Back is as important an issue to them as other things. Inexplicable. [source]

Desperate Housewives star Jesse Metcalf checks into rehab too! Wow – way to really cement your status as a desperate f-list celebrity. The only people going to rehab nowadays are the young ones, like LiLo and Britney who HAVE to in order to maintain a balance between being in their early twenties and doing the whole exploratory, excessive drinking thing and being in the relentlessly judgemental international public eye and actual addicts. Rehab is on the way out. You’d be better off wearing a shower cap if you want to get relevant, Jesse. Or, you know, some noticeable shirtless, critically acclaimed acting work. Yeah, that just might be the ticket to that extra career boost you’re looking for. Actual quality work. [source]

While Naomi Campbell’s lawyer clearly paid attention to what happened to Boy George and was savvy and pushy enough to negotiate penance duties that would happen behind heavily patrolled and closed doors, it doesn’t stop the manager of the venue she’s currently scrubbing from indulging what could only possibly be a personal erotic fantasy by making her, on the penultimate day of her community service, scrub the men’s locker room. No news on what she was made to wear. [source]

While everything is ratings-happy tense and difficult for the women on the View because they argue from different perspective, why is Elisabeth Hasselbeck actually upset and claiming that Barbara Walters has no control over the show? Her role is to play the spoilt brat right wing ex-cheerleader who emulates her father’s views in order to represent the ideal in American family values from the perspective of the average alpha male – ie. that women (wives and daughters alike) are submissive. She’s just like Michelle Malkin who performs a certain, highly marketable and lucrative perspective. That’s the deal. She gets paid. End of story. Why is Hasselbeck upset and ranting in the Post that her viewpoint isn’t being respected when it was never meant to be based on facts or respected anyway? She’s only there to be the right wing one everyone rolls their eyes at. Rattle off your predictable inanity, Elisabeth. Then go to the bank, cash your check and get on with it and for Christ's sake don't cry. [source]

Charlie Sheen and Rosie O’Donnell jump on the “9/11 was an inside job bandwagon”. Ok, so it’s pretty far fetched and also kind of irresponsible for a public figure to start spouting such unsubstantiated crap but let’s also remember that Rosie is on the warpath to get her own show so she needs sensationalism at all costs and Charlie Sheen, well, he has a sitcom – doesn’t he? Who knows? What’s great about this New York Post item, however, isn’t the actual story. It’s the way the White House felating paper itself immediately characterises Sheen as a “hooker loving Hollywood hunk” just to stab the knife…er…letter opener in. [source]

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