Friday, March 09, 2007

Celebrity Madness

James Brown has been dead, what, 3 months now and his body is still above ground because the family can’t quite stop bickering about money. How classy. Have any of the family members stopped fretting over the will long enough to check and see if insects or rodents, heaven forbid, have moved into the body of the Godfather of Soul? Seems like his body would be prime vermin real estate. [source]

Either Madonna has flipped out Tom Cruise style and she’s hired a firm to specifically make it look like she’s not a maddeningly narcissistic control freak or she actually is more of an adult than ever before. Her (sincerely) GENIUS new H and M line commercial comes out. What a shame though, just as she really has roped it in, her nanny is about to let it all out in a tell-all book. [source]

Keith Urban claims he feels hurt when he is called "Mr Kidman" but you know, the story is much bigger than his anxiety. It’s really about karma – celebrity karma. Nicole Kidman married strategically up into fame and now she’s just returning the gift. She’s giving a little back. And the reluctant whore Keith Urban should just take the free meal ticket he already signed on for and get on with his life.

While in Japan, surrounded by thousands of fans, some of whom paid 3500 dollars to see him, Michael Jackson’s ego inflates to the size of a pachyderm, all recent memory of more or less being unwelcome in entire cities around the world melts away and he says that he wouldn’t change a thing that has happened to him over the past 40 years. He says his career trajectory from the age of 6 was just right. When you think about it, a good media covered pederast accusation has traditionally helped people really mobilise public support so his point it well taken. [source]

Eddie van Halen is an alcoholic and he goes into rehab. Somehow the idea of an aging rocker who drinks heavily sounds like a more realistic candidate than the previous 70 million celebrities that have gone in. [source]

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