Thursday, November 16, 2006

According to a census taken in 2001 there are more people in England and Wales who consider themselves Jedis than there are people who consider themselves Sikhs, Jews or Buddhists. That’s right, Jedis. From the Star Wars movies. What they want, apart from to be loved, is for the UN to change the International Day for Tolerance to the Interstellar Day of Tolerance which would more or less show a certain respect for their “faith”.

But what does this really mean?

It really means that England and Wales have an unusually high concentration of middle class university students and computer programmers who smoke pot, play extremely complex video games, live with their parents, have bad acne, are either too skinny or too fat - with the exception of that one hot one in every group of about 30 but the hot one doesn’t know he’s hot – they have massive social phobia, were beat up at school, have nervous ticks, masturbate to pictures of Sarah Michelle Gellar, early shots of Carrie Fisher or Harrison Ford and have never been laid and that they're coming out of their basements because they're hungry for more than just maddening levels of escapism.
Oh, I kid. It sounds cute. Why not give them an international day?

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