Thursday, February 01, 2007

Celebrity Madness

Could it be any more obvious that Pete Doherty is a total loser? The only thing more amazing than the brazen flippancy with which Pete Doherty goes back to a hotel room with two Australian girls and shoots up cocaine in front of them is the mountain of arbitrary, ass covering disclaimers the Sun provides prior to simply screening the footage of him doing it to make it look like they aren't just showing the footage for shock purposes. And, as predictably as ever, here's the link.

Like the imperious bully jock asshole it is, Fox News reacts to the fact that it's beating Anderson Cooper in the ratings game by attacking him openly with an ad campaign that compares him to Paris Hilton. It really begs the question - if you're so much more successful than Cooper, why bother investing money in making him look bad? Maybe he's not doing as badly as they say he is? Maybe they're beating up the skinny clarinet player in the playground because they fear staring at their own unavoidable inner skinny clarinet player? And ...other...metaphors that make them look like assholes. In the clip below - Fox news anchors even make a sexist joke about how lame it is for Anderson to be beaten by a woman - in front of the very woman they're referring to. Wow, classy. Even though Anderson doesn't have the guts to come out - it's safe to say that he's more woman they will ever be and more woman than they'll ever least without paying for it or raping it.

Astoundingly, despite rumours to the contrary, Hayden Christiensen and Sienna Miller did not actually have sex on camera while filming Factory Girl. Well, now, a sex scene that isn't real? In a movie? That simply can't be. People are talking about it after all. It must be a real sex scene. It's totally inexplicable that two actors would be acting as though they're having sex.

In reporting Tara Conner's emergence from rehab, next to the Entertainment Tonight interview she did where she explained she was an alcoholic and an addict and yet made the claim that she didn't drink or take drugs both on the night of her crowning or in the weeks leading up (ah...what kind of a lame ass addict/liar ARE you?), the Daily News runs a story that is based around asking celebrity publicists to comment on which accessories emphasise successful transcendence of addiction. There's no real curtain anymore, just the basic, raw, three-ring circus.

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