Tuesday, June 03, 2008

The Daily News reports that Lindsay Lohan attended the MTV Movie Awards and as she was being photographed the wind blew her skirt up and revealed that she was wearing what is known as a Spanx slip – basically a more streamlined girdle that is apparently often used in Hollywood by actresses to bring their figures down up to a half a dress size.

Maybe Lohan is bloated and building up a quality gut after she gave up uppers. That’s one theory I have. The other is that she is finally reacting to the insane public breakdown of her ludicrous family because she’s actually aware of it for the first time.

Either way, I think it’s reassuring that we can finally find something less than perfect about Lindsay Lohan to make her seem more accessible and human. Finally, there’s a flaw and it’s been revealed. Lohan wears a corset to keep her gut in. This reminds me of that stupid STUPID Cheech and Chong movie where one of them plays a supermodel movie star who slashes his face to give the other actors a chance. Oh, actually, maybe Lohan has necrosis. You know, when you have necrosis you have to wear a gurdle of some kind because if you don’t, your guts will fall out of your stomach because the disease eats away at your flesh. Yeah, isn’t that alluring? I’m so peckish! [source]

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