Monday, March 31, 2008

TMZ is reporting that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie may or may not have gotten married but no one knows whether or not it actually happened.

The great part about this rumour reportage is actually the fact that they don’t even really report what the rumour was specifically or where it came from. I mean, it could feasibly not have even been a rumour seeing as the story TMZ ran is almost entirely about how it wouldn’t really be necessary for Brangelina to marry and second to that the fact that no one cares anyway. (71% of readers polled opted to vote for "Who Cares?". )

What a fascinating idea – run a story where you don’t report the story and then explain how no one would care about it even if you did after actually demonstrating statistically that no one cares.

Still, the idea is interesting. The reality is Pitt and Jolie really don’t need to get married because their union is already ordained by all seven facets of the Continental Principalities and is consecrated and pure beyond all earthly manifestation and so, really, if you think about it, marriage would probably dirty them. Yes, it would probably muddy the union that exists between the patron saints of Western culture. Plus, why marry when you’ve already got a mash up name anyway. Not that many people get to have media accredited mash-up names and frankly, that’s more marketable and fun at dinner parties than marriage is. [source]

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