Friday, March 28, 2008


God Ivana Trump is annoying. The New York Post reports that she’s fighting incessantly with her fiancé Rossando Rubicondi who is, of course, about 85 years younger than her and that even her friends think she’s just getting married for the publicity. OK! Magazine is paying her a million dollars for the photo rights to the wedding.


What the hell does she need publicity for? She’s a ludicrous socialite freak who swans about town spending money when she’s not having her body stapled up. What’s her cause? What’s her career?

Plus, a few weeks ago on The View, Barbara Walters showed the invitation to Ivana Trump’s wedding which said that women weren’t allowed to wear pastel yellow or pink and that men have to wear white tie. You just know everything is going to be a high maintenance tuna fest when the freaking bride is telling guests what to wear months out from the wedding.

Maybe this is what she does all day. This is her new little project to obsess over. She’s organizing the wedding. Actually, that’s the surefire indication that she’s tuna. She’s obsessing over her wedding. Only the most high maintenance of freaks do that. It can never be a simple outdoor ceremony with these people who have infinite money and nothing to do all day. No, it has to be a massive Zeffirelli opera happening in real life.

She is being given away by her two porcine sons and her daughter, Ivanka is one of 25 bridesmaids. 25. She has 25 freaking bridesmaids. I swear to GOD. Plus, her gown is going to be one of six she chose from the Paris Fashion Week runway shows. It’s that important.

Even though the sons look like they’d be freaking weirdos, Ivanka seems more or less together. She’s not completely freaky and she’s dating Jared Kushner who is cute and seems to be pretty on top of things. He owns a few buildings and is the publisher of the New York Observer. I’m just wondering how on earth she managed to come out essentially unscathed with a heavily marinated slab of tuna show mother like that.
Ivana Trump would be the kind of woman who you’d meet and she’d look through you or she’d look around the room as you talked to her because she’s always looking for someone more important to latch onto. Or she’d glaze over. Still, if she stopped doing the things like get married for no reason what else would she do? Probably melt into a screaming puddle of vacuous, narcissistic pointlessness. [source]

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