Friday, December 08, 2006

Christmas time is possibly the last part of the year, with the possible exception of Easter, that you'd expect Christians to scramble desperately for meaning. In Miami, it appears, that isn't the case though.

The new public pet hate of attention starved Floridian religious zealots needing a little last minute reassurance that despite those few dark sexual secrets they don't talk about at parties, they're still going to heaven, are an item charmingly titled, "pornuments".

Pornuments are, of course, little Christmas decorations that are in the shape of Frosty the Snowman rogering Mrs. Clause etc. so Christians are up in arms for the sake of innocence or a cause equally vague but no less dire. What could be more natural and life affirming than that?
Genius chant quote:

"We want to save our generation from Pornaments,"

It's hot because you know a clean cut young Christian farm boy had to say the word porn in order to complete the chant.

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