The Reluctant Whore

Two days ago Anderson Cooper co-hosted Live with Regis and Kelly and decided to tear into Dina Lohan for existing and also tore apart the E! reality show, “Living Lohan” as a “trainwreck”. Obviously he’s right – it is one of the most blatantly horrific and shocking examples of Dina Lohan’s delusional personality. So, naturally, Dina Lohan fired back with the uncharacteristically understated response, “People are just cruel!" she said. "This is bad karma for him."

So, Anderson took the bait as well and followed up on it with the above TV spot. Who knows why, perhaps he needs the ratings and he’s under pressure so he went the easy route. This is the kind of thing Ann Coulter does; she just says things that will resonate on any level. He could just as easily have done his newscast shirtless which would have, I believe, attracted more viewers although, admittedly, it would have diluted his integrity somewhat.

I didn’t care about this two days ago but now I’m really all excited about it. I think my initial reaction to the story was a knee-jerk “just ignore her” one because it involved Dina Lohan and I think that if we stop paying attention to her she will fade away. I sometimes think she might actually physically fade away like some kind of 80s apparition dream sequence. Those days are often the hard days. Like, where you get up and have to speak to a series of moron customer service idiots who tell you the exact opposite of what is possible because they suck at their jobs. I escape to a mildly alternate place on those days – a place where Dina Lohan will cease to be actual matter.

The thing is, now – 2 days later – I was watching the video clips and I was amazed. I love it when Anderson Cooper gets sassy and I found myself watching the timer of the video wind down and I just sat there, hoping it wouldn’t run out. I mean, I really was. I don’t even know why. I think Anderson has the appeal of a news reader who you know is sassy and dirty behind the CNN smile. Sort of like Royalty but with less ludicrousness.

So, in short – Anderson Cooper is hammering Dina Lohan and …ok, the rest isn’t important. Anderson Cooper.