A forward thinking 43 year old fireman from Chicago has submitted a photo of Bruce Willis to an Indian plastic surgeon (!) with the instruction that he be made to look like the movie star.
Wow, let's talk about totally delusional masculine anxiety and inherent same sex attraction subverted to the point where it's simply absurd.
Best quotes ever:
"I am a firefighter. I need to look the part. I wanted to improve my jawline. Bruce Willis has a nice, strong jaw," he told the Hindustan Times after surgery.
Fair enough. However, you can almost hear him slow down and start to salivate at the idea of being even remotely near to Bruce Willis' nice, strong jaw. Perhaps it's difficult for a firefighter to be sexually attracted to Bruce Willis - or indeed a man at all for that matter so maybe this guy realises his sexual attraction by being attracted to a movie star and then acts on it, oddly, by becoming the object of his erotic fixation.
Second best quote (from the doctor in India):
"he said that as a man who jumps into burning buildings, people in the community look up to him and he needed to maintain his macho image "
Which is fair enough, really. It's common for firefighters to go through this need to reclaim apparently lost masculinity, isn't it? Where did it go? Who says? Who says people would prefer to be rescued by Bruce Willis than not at all?
Why are people allowed to talk no matter what? Maybe the joke's on me for stating the cripplingly obvious.