Apparently caffeine in mints, moisturisers, soda, aspirin and of course coffee is not enough to keep your average midtown administrationiste both perky and convinced she's burning calories while sitting for 8 hours a day, so a molecular scientist in North Carolina has taken it upon himself to find a way to insert caffeine into donuts - for the peace of mind of the chronically addicted everywhere. According to news reports, these donuts aren't bitter as is the case when you eat caffeine (who knew?), they're just as sweet as ever before and if you have one you're getting the equivalent of two and a half cups of coffee worth of caffeine in each pastry.
So, if you eat one and then another and you just can't stop and you end up maniacally shovelling them into your face eventually you'll get to the point where you're speeding so much that your metabolism will burn up the fat and sugar in the donuts without you even trying - which more or less makes these donuts the cake equivalent of celery.
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