Wednesday, October 01, 2008

TMZ reports that despite reports that she was driving erratically and was under the influence of drugs, Heather Locklear was set up by an ex-staffer from US Weekly. They report:

Jill Ishkanian, who allegedly hacked into Us Weekly's computer system to locate celebs after she left the mag, was following Locklear in the Montecito area. Ishkanian watched the actress go to a market. When Heather got in her car, Ishkanian called 911, even though the car wasn't even moving at the time.

Ishkanian is the only witness to Locklear’s alleged questionable driving.

See, Heather Locklear is now in one of my favourite positions. She has essentially got a water tight alibi and really didn’t do anything wrong at all and it’s clear that someone else is to blame for the entire thing. This is like one of those times where you turn up to class and you’re late because you had to see someone in the front office and when you get there, the entire class is in trouble for talking but because you weren’t there, you get off scott-free. There’s nothing like the legitimate, water tight alibi that helps your escape from danger. It’s one of my favourite things next to getting a black car to the airport for an international flight in the evening when it’s raining and ordering the lasagna at L’il Frankie’s in the East Village on a Thursday night.

Now, all Heather Locklear has to do is sit back and let the offers roll in. Plus, she can sue for damages, make some cute coin, and have something to do for a year while the case gets drawn out. Plus, Jill Ishkanian sounds like a mad bitch so whatever she does from now on is bound to be hilarious. [source]

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