Wednesday, October 01, 2008

Janet Jackson has now postponed two concerts due to illness. This is worse than I originally thought. She really must be regretting calling her concert tour “Rock Witchu”. I mean, the awkwardness I feel just having written it once today is enough to make me want to medicate with a nice can of cream cheese frosting. I can understand the kind of nausea she must be feeling now.

Still, what’s nice about this is that she too is like Heather Locklear. She has a water tight alibi. I’m guessing that this is how it worked out:

She suddenly realized that the title of her concert tour was ludicrous. She went into shock, regained full consciousness and became nauseous and was then rushed to hospital. The doctors examined her and said she was legitimately ill. She then felt a sense of calm because that illness was her totally legitimate reason for not being on stage in a show called Rock Witchu.

I have now written that twice and I feel like there’s something going on in my stomach. Granted, I haven’t eaten much today but I will say this: If I were to measure the level of nausea before saying it and the level after there was a definite increase.

Janet Jackson needs an escape route. I don’t know what she is going to do, these are powerful forces. [source]

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