Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Today in Extraordinarily Odd

Kim Jong Il, the paranoid dictator of North Korea has just had a birthday and South Korean President Roh Moo-hyun decided it would be a good idea to hand him a collection of DVDs that are banned in North Korea. Frankly, giving the control freak Kim Jong Il a set of DVDs he himself banned is subversive and funny. It’s a great story. In fact, I’m re-telling it right now to my accountant. The thing is, what if he got freaked out and killed a bunch of children or hookers because he thought they were spying on him and the gift pushed him over the edge? That could have happened. Just because you’re paranoid, does not mean that everyone isn’t trying to oust your from your position. Stay freaked out Kim Jong Il – it’s gotten you this far. [source]
A couple in Prague were getting a lot of crap from people down at the pub regarding their new baby. Apparently, no one at the pub believed the baby was truly theirs because it had different hair to them both. So, they went and got a DNA test and found out that the baby was not actually genetically linked to either of them. Here’s what great about Prague. Where the doctors fail you on a momentus level, drunk bar flies will pick up the slack and who can think of anything more comforting than an appendix removal by a drunk 48 year old divorcee who isn’t allowed to see his kids? No one, that’s who. [source]
The Catholic Church really are masterminds when it comes to marketing. They’ve just come out with a book about the Pope that is being marketed as having been written by the pope’s cat. The president does crap like this too. I’ve never heard of a book being written by a dog or cat unless there’s a tremendous amount of international political manipulation going on underneath it. Because that’s the way it works when you’re into massed human manipulation. You have to recruit the new members by pretending to be a cat. If a cat rather than a man of the cloth says, “and if you don’t do what I say, you’ll burn in hell forever…” somehow the message gets across but the cat isn’t being abusive. The story begins, “and it's not every day that a cat can call the Holy Father his friend and write his story. “ That’s right, it’s not every day. It’s freaking never. The cat is a hired actor. The pope has no friends. [source]

1 comment:

fiona peel said...

Jesus' cat is my best friend.