It turns out yesterday’s Puerto Rican trooper of a beauty pageant contestant, Ingrid Marie Rivera – the woman who put on makeup that was allegedly laced with pepper spray, may actually have made up the story about how much it burned and how she had to consider whether she was a masochist before going on to win the comp. It’s weird how beauty queens do this kind of thing. Miss New Jersey, Amy Polumbo made a huge deal out of nothing when someone hacked into her facebook profile and took her private photos and then did the morning TV rounds to explain it away. The whole thing was a total non-issue that played on the bland sensibilities of America’s prudish consciousness. God, she was boring. I actually resent even having to think about that boring boring girl. BORING. Anyway, maybe it’s smart to create this scandal. Maybe they all realize that unless they go above and beyond the call of duty to get some press with these pageants, all that Vaseline on the teeth, starving, emotional repression and personality pruning will mean nothing more than White Castle grand openings and a potential cheap and nasty Playboy shoot. They have to do something. Rivera was far more interesting than Polumbo. Actually, I would even go so far as to suggest that Polumbo be sent away and never allowed to return. She was so BORING. [source]
Officials in Cameroon are holding two smugglers from Ghana who have attempted to smuggle 500 African Grey parrots to Bahrain. What that essentially means is that someone in Bahrain will not be able to see the African Grey Parrot choir do it’s rendition of the 1812 Overture written entirely for parrot, triangle and symphonic canon. I doubt I’ll be the first to say, “What a terrible shame”. [source]
A 1.5 kilogram truffle that, let’s face it, looks like a dried out fungal growth cut directly off a diseased elderly man’s foot, is to be sold at auction in Macau and sellers are expecting around 150,000 Euros for it. The thing about this truffle is that either you use it, in which case you’ve seriously just spent 150,000 Euros on a big stupid fungus or you just put it on display somewhere. Like, maybe you would put it on the mantelpiece when guests come round and you’d casually mention it in anecdote but not really point it out. Either way, it just sort of doesn’t really FEEL like it would be a terribly intelligent way to spend 150,000 Euros. Unless you’re uber rich and bored and it’s either this or have sex with the beast that will eventually become your dinner before you eat it in Japan which people seriously do. If you’re tossing up between those two options buy the freaking truffle for Christ’s sake. [source]
No comments:
Post a Comment