The Reluctant Whore

I was just thinking about how we hadn’t had a good solid rehab story in a while and like some kind of universal gift on a platter made of nubile flesh, here’s one. Delivered within minutes and already free.

Steve-O, from TV’s “Jackass” is in rehab after being picked up by the police for smacking the crap out of his own apartment and filming it. He wrote on his blog today about his alcoholism and how his mother was one and how she fed him liquor as a baby etc.

Yeah yeah, we all had that. I apparently got drunk at 2 because I wandered around a pub in Balmain, Australia drinking from everyone’s glasses in the pub. My mother thought it was amusing, I’m assuming in retrospect not while it was happening. On second thoughts, I wonder if drinking from everyone’s glasses was the most hygienic thing to do. I’m talking about everyone in the bar, not just the people I was with.

Anyway, so, the crazy assed Steve-O always struck me as just being one of those annoying American kids who have ADD and just don’t know when to shut the hell up and stop acting like a douche bag because they have self absorbed idiot parents who don’t know how to discipline their kids and they also get things like mini chocolate bars in their lunch along with white bread sandwiches. I figured he just randomly stumbled upon this way of getting paid to act like the douche bag he was as a kid. So, it all worked out. He was, in many ways, the American dream.
So, anyway – now with admissions on his blog like this:

Mom was very alcoholic, and I feel that is a grossunderstatement. I’d love to say that I first took toalcohol out of affection for my mother (there wasnever any shortage of that for me) but I think thetruth is that I was always powerless over it. I know Iwas always powerless over alcoholism, because it hadsuch a grip on Mom’s adulthood and my childhood, and Inever chose to fight it. Until now.

Really, I’m not trying to "toot my own horn," it’stime for me to "hang up my hat," to "throw in thetowel," it’s time for me to "call it quits."

And while that’s really great on a human level, in the sense that he’s going to hopefully give up all the addictions and get clean – it really begs the question “What will he do now?” because his entire celebrity appeal is anchored in being a crazy assed freak. He couldn’t really put on a three piece tweed suit, sit in a Queen Ann chair in front of a fire and introduce televised recordings of live productions of Britten operas, could he? Well, maybe he could, if he wore tiny little wire framed glasses and had a sleeping cat next to him that was on fire but that didn’t care. Yes, that’s one option. [source]