The Reluctant Whore

So, apparently today is all about writing the names of people who should never be written about.

Heidi rancid Montag and Spencer “somebody please fuck my ass until I cry and finally shut the hell up and disappear” Pratt (JESUS – I mean, his fucking last name is PRATT for CHRIST’S SAKE) are operating like shrewd political operatives at the moment and it’s interesting even if it is as transparent as any right wing politician’s use of Christianity to get votes.

Yesterday Montag was quoted as saying she’d pray for Lauren Conrad, her other rancid Republican cast mate on “The Hills” which followed on from her inadvertent endorsement of John McCain – even though she clearly has no real idea what it meant for her to do that.

Now, she and Pratt are coming out in defense of the vastly popular Miley Cyrus after Cyrus is currently battling a predictable backlash from middle America for baring her back in photos by Annie Leibovitz for Vanity Fair.

Align selves with the Christian right? Check!
Align selves with the Republican party? Check!
Align selves with fans of the most popular show for children in the country? Check!

Spencer Pratt should just bite the bullet go into politics. I’m talking local politics though. Nothing with any real weight, just something that would placate his ego, get him a desk and an assistant and keep him the fuck out of the news so much. Put him in charge of the parking meters in downtown Chino. Just anything to keep him busy so his Cardinal Ratzinger meets bland assed porno surfer face doesn’t get so much press. Montag is already the perfect politician’s wife; she’s thin, blonde, enhanced and easy to push around. Plus, she has no self esteem so she won’t ever feel like she’s being used.

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