Today in Extraordinarily Odd
A study conducted in the UK and reported in the Nursing Standard magazine has found that all 250 patients aged between four and 16 that were quizzed disliked the use of clowns, with even the older ones finding them scary. I’m not exactly sure why it’s taken this long to ascertain that clowns are the embodiment of horror. They’re always played by these fat, loud, chain smoking alcoholic rapists who yell in white trash accents, sweat profusely and smell. Either that or they’re weird, hyper trained Eurotrash. I mean, what’s calming and lovely about either of those. One is going to rape your mother or sister and beat the shit out of you and the other is going to smoke opium in your bathroom and scream with night terrors and the vanish in the night with your jewels. How on earth that was mistaken for innocent childhood birthday party pleasantry is completely beyond me. Sorry clowns, you’re universally freakish. Get out.
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Scientists in Uruguay have found the fossil remains of a 2,000 pound (1,000 kg) rodent that lived 2 million to 4 million years ago -- the largest rodent ever found which means that today is officially, “confront your deepest darkest horrific childhood nightmares” day. Wow, just when the meds were starting to kick in. Great. So, hi – what a tremendous sickening beast that tonne of rodent would be. I mean, imagine the deafening squealing and scratching and scurrying. That tail that drags along the ground. Horror. Meanwhile, if it lived in the jungle it would probably be really placid. Like that mega rat found recently that just wandered into a scientist’s jungle, research camp. It was just some dumb ass big rat that went, “Oh hi guys, what are you guys doing? Can I eat your food and shit like that?” blissfully unaware that it was in danger of being beaten. So, in short, thank GOD that one tonne rat is a fossil and thank God, I’m now and adult. Sort of.
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Republicans and Democrats may be dominating the US presidential race, but when it comes to the bedroom, it is independents who have better sex, according to Playboy magazine's Politics of Sex survey. The interesting thing about this is that during the last election I wrote a feature for the Village Voice which talked about how the political struggle between Dems and Republicans was so great that it was causing sexual politics to shift. According to a study done in 2004, Republicans were better in bed. In hindsight, I think that’s because Republicans would probably have lied about how happy they were emotionally and sexually but still, it illustrated the cultural dynamic really well and then the Republicans went on to win the election. It’s interesting that in this poll America seems to be distrustful of mainstream political parties. Maybe Bloomberg will win. It’s clear from this that ultimately, a lot of people are uptight right now. Only people who have no real chance of winning are relaxed enough to have sex.
[source]
A study conducted in the UK and reported in the Nursing Standard magazine has found that all 250 patients aged between four and 16 that were quizzed disliked the use of clowns, with even the older ones finding them scary. I’m not exactly sure why it’s taken this long to ascertain that clowns are the embodiment of horror. They’re always played by these fat, loud, chain smoking alcoholic rapists who yell in white trash accents, sweat profusely and smell. Either that or they’re weird, hyper trained Eurotrash. I mean, what’s calming and lovely about either of those. One is going to rape your mother or sister and beat the shit out of you and the other is going to smoke opium in your bathroom and scream with night terrors and the vanish in the night with your jewels. How on earth that was mistaken for innocent childhood birthday party pleasantry is completely beyond me. Sorry clowns, you’re universally freakish. Get out. [source]
Scientists in Uruguay have found the fossil remains of a 2,000 pound (1,000 kg) rodent that lived 2 million to 4 million years ago -- the largest rodent ever found which means that today is officially, “confront your deepest darkest horrific childhood nightmares” day. Wow, just when the meds were starting to kick in. Great. So, hi – what a tremendous sickening beast that tonne of rodent would be. I mean, imagine the deafening squealing and scratching and scurrying. That tail that drags along the ground. Horror. Meanwhile, if it lived in the jungle it would probably be really placid. Like that mega rat found recently that just wandered into a scientist’s jungle, research camp. It was just some dumb ass big rat that went, “Oh hi guys, what are you guys doing? Can I eat your food and shit like that?” blissfully unaware that it was in danger of being beaten. So, in short, thank GOD that one tonne rat is a fossil and thank God, I’m now and adult. Sort of. [source]
Republicans and Democrats may be dominating the US presidential race, but when it comes to the bedroom, it is independents who have better sex, according to Playboy magazine's Politics of Sex survey. The interesting thing about this is that during the last election I wrote a feature for the Village Voice which talked about how the political struggle between Dems and Republicans was so great that it was causing sexual politics to shift. According to a study done in 2004, Republicans were better in bed. In hindsight, I think that’s because Republicans would probably have lied about how happy they were emotionally and sexually but still, it illustrated the cultural dynamic really well and then the Republicans went on to win the election. It’s interesting that in this poll America seems to be distrustful of mainstream political parties. Maybe Bloomberg will win. It’s clear from this that ultimately, a lot of people are uptight right now. Only people who have no real chance of winning are relaxed enough to have sex. [source] 
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